So.... I think it goes without really saying, but I snore. Which actually isn't all that uncommon for males. But I hate it. I hate it because my wonderful wife suffers from it. I sleep perfectly fine which I feel terrible for.
So yesterday I wake up and I want to get the problem solved! I want to be the best husband ever and make one of the ideas work. Here are a couple that I read about:
Tip 1. Sleep on your side. - I already do. My issue is that I don't stay on my side. I have tried using a pillow in front and behind me to keep me from rolling over.
Tip 2. Get a humidifier - It is already kind of humid in the room, and I really don't want to spend fifty bucks on something like that. Though I did see a really cool elephant one in the store the other day. Though I am pretty sure of the look I would get if I came home with one of those...
Tip 3. Go get a sleep test - which probably would help, but I don't think it's apnea because there isn't any wheezing or choking, it's more of just heavy breath when it's not snoring.
Tip 4. Sew a tennis ball to the back of a shirt - which I tried and I'll explain below (whole point of the post).
Tip 5. Do throat exercises (or sing) for 30 minutes a day - This is to help fight against your throat narrowing, but I've realized I don't really work in an environment where this is appropriate.
Tip 6. Sleep strips - They work, I think? They also help get rid of any blackheads that might be on your nose as well, mainly because it rips a couple of layers off your nose when you take it off.
Tip 7. White noise machines - Work for me, but not for her. Which is the whole point of trying to take care of the snoring problem.
Tips 7,8, & 9 - LOSE WEIGHT - Which if anyone really knows me, is sort of a battle. But I am trying to fight it as best as possible.
After reading all of those, I thought to myself, "Self, what can you do today that would stop your snoring?" To which I decided to sew a tennis ball to the back of my shirt.
I got one of my old church shirts, and went to work last night. Before we went to bed I put on the shirt, and it was uncomfortable to wear walking around (I was trying to get used to it as much as possible). And like the loving Quasimodo, I the loving tennis-back of Dallas Texas, was so happy that I could help my wife. I even wrote in my journal about it. We prayed and then I was off to sleep.
Last night was probably the worst nights sleep that I have ever had. When I would roll over onto my back, BOOM! I was up again... So finally somehow I had managed to fall asleep when to my surprise, I would roll over. Again. And this process repeated throughout the night. But did I take the shirt off? No! I was going to be the wonderful husband, who helped his wife stay asleep throughout the night because he didn't snore.
Riiiiight.
Turns out because of the blasted tennis ball, I was tossing and turning all night. And even though we had the white noise app on, my wife could still hear everything (it's the thought that counts right?).
So. I am enlisting the help of anyone this reaches. Husbands be prepared because you are about to be put on blast:
I am trying to find the best remedy to snoring. I don't want the "suggested" ideas, because I believe the people that write those have never used them. If they did, they are probably chuckling every time they wake up. Thinking to themselves, "I wonder what sucker had to go through tip 2, or 5".
I want the tested and tried. I will do everything. Except for putting something like peanut butter on my feet. That would just be gross. But seriously, I will do anything as long as it comes from a credible source of it's success.
So yesterday I wake up and I want to get the problem solved! I want to be the best husband ever and make one of the ideas work. Here are a couple that I read about:
Tip 1. Sleep on your side. - I already do. My issue is that I don't stay on my side. I have tried using a pillow in front and behind me to keep me from rolling over.
Tip 2. Get a humidifier - It is already kind of humid in the room, and I really don't want to spend fifty bucks on something like that. Though I did see a really cool elephant one in the store the other day. Though I am pretty sure of the look I would get if I came home with one of those...
Tip 3. Go get a sleep test - which probably would help, but I don't think it's apnea because there isn't any wheezing or choking, it's more of just heavy breath when it's not snoring.
Tip 4. Sew a tennis ball to the back of a shirt - which I tried and I'll explain below (whole point of the post).
Tip 5. Do throat exercises (or sing) for 30 minutes a day - This is to help fight against your throat narrowing, but I've realized I don't really work in an environment where this is appropriate.
Tip 6. Sleep strips - They work, I think? They also help get rid of any blackheads that might be on your nose as well, mainly because it rips a couple of layers off your nose when you take it off.
Tip 7. White noise machines - Work for me, but not for her. Which is the whole point of trying to take care of the snoring problem.
Tips 7,8, & 9 - LOSE WEIGHT - Which if anyone really knows me, is sort of a battle. But I am trying to fight it as best as possible.
After reading all of those, I thought to myself, "Self, what can you do today that would stop your snoring?" To which I decided to sew a tennis ball to the back of my shirt.
I got one of my old church shirts, and went to work last night. Before we went to bed I put on the shirt, and it was uncomfortable to wear walking around (I was trying to get used to it as much as possible). And like the loving Quasimodo, I the loving tennis-back of Dallas Texas, was so happy that I could help my wife. I even wrote in my journal about it. We prayed and then I was off to sleep.
Last night was probably the worst nights sleep that I have ever had. When I would roll over onto my back, BOOM! I was up again... So finally somehow I had managed to fall asleep when to my surprise, I would roll over. Again. And this process repeated throughout the night. But did I take the shirt off? No! I was going to be the wonderful husband, who helped his wife stay asleep throughout the night because he didn't snore.
Riiiiight.
Turns out because of the blasted tennis ball, I was tossing and turning all night. And even though we had the white noise app on, my wife could still hear everything (it's the thought that counts right?).
So. I am enlisting the help of anyone this reaches. Husbands be prepared because you are about to be put on blast:
I am trying to find the best remedy to snoring. I don't want the "suggested" ideas, because I believe the people that write those have never used them. If they did, they are probably chuckling every time they wake up. Thinking to themselves, "I wonder what sucker had to go through tip 2, or 5".
I want the tested and tried. I will do everything. Except for putting something like peanut butter on my feet. That would just be gross. But seriously, I will do anything as long as it comes from a credible source of it's success.
